Time for a late night stream-of-consciousness post

It's not actually that late... don't know why I'm falling asleep. Maybe because J's still at work. Listening to Breathe on repeat. Not sure why I'm doing this. It's my habit of smacking an emotional bruise repeatedly until it's numb and doesn't hurt anymore. Planning on selling the house and getting a place closer to J's work, and friends. I've decided to not tell mom we're moving. We're taking bets on how long it takes her to find out. Considering part of the reason we were looking for a house on this side of town was because she wanted us close, but she's not been here since what, Thanksgiving? Have lost track. Patrick's betting on 3 weeks, wanna join the pool? I'm looking forward to selling 99% of our stuff, actually. J just called, he's getting food because the server won't come back up so he's going to be there for a while, hopefully won't have to rebuild it tonight. Khang came over this afternoon/evening, it was good to see him. His work is stressing him out - too many idiots, too much unfair bullshit. I think I'll ask if I can borrow his sister's bike so we can go riding. I was trying to figure out how to locate cathedrals the other night. I felt the need to go sit by myself in a large sacred space. A large untouched wilderness would do too, actually. And the wilderness might not be locked, like most churches are anymore days. I need a safe place. I'd like church more if it weren't for the people. Ironic, that. I wish I could find an old fashioned church building that just had sacred choir music 24/7. here in town again tell he's been down for a while but my god it's so beautiful when the boy smiles wanna hold him maybe I'll just sing about it. I think I'll check the schedule at FSU and see if there are any interesting free musical performances. Falling asleep while typing leads you to write interesting things. Winter just wasn't my season. I can't believe it's already so hot here.

What was I going to say? Shoot, dunno. Maybe it'll come to me. Tomorrow. Sleep now. Life's like an hourglass glued to the table.